Workplace Rules for Women

Every organization has unwritten rules: which executives to butter up, how late to stay, whether after-hours socializing is optional. But women face a few situations that underscore their "otherness" — and the rules differ from institution to institution, said Laura Sabattini, director of research at Catalyst, the nonprofit dedicated to expanding women's opportunities in business.

Career experts, professionals, and coaches asked by ABC News to address these situations offered practical navigation. A few of the scenarios:

When you aren't a big drinker. The deal closes and the team heads out; a senior executive buys a round of tequila shots and your glass stays full. "Socializing outside the workplace is an important way to further your career," said Lois Frankel, career coach and author of See Jane Lead. "With that said, it doesn't mean you have to close down the bar." Her advice: show you're willing to have fun while staying as close to sober as possible — order something that looks clear, sip one glass of wine without refilling. One female analyst said she tipped the bartender generously and quietly asked for a third of the usual alcohol in her drinks. And if a superior offers to get you a drink, don't refuse — declining marks you as not a team player, said former investment banker Nina Godiwalla.

When the invitation is to the strip club. The scenario in the piece's headline was the bluntest: a male-dominated team-building outing that a woman can't comfortably join, can't comfortably decline, and can't win either way — the purest illustration of how "team culture" can quietly exclude.

The common thread: women at work aren't just doing the job, they're constantly reading rooms that were not designed for them, and the penalty for reading them wrong is always higher than it is for their male colleagues.

Reporting: ABC News.